The Big Overhaul

You know those moments that just inspire you?  From watching almost instant photos arrive from Mars to crying over this kid's greatness, life can just rock.  For those of you who have been following along either here on the blog or on Facebook or Twitter, you know I'm a pretty positive person.  That's how I choose to live my life.  The key word there is "choose".

Now why is that?  Well, I wasn't always this positive and some days, I'm still not--I'm an actor, for goodness sake.  I've posted before about life changes and people always ask me how I do it.  It's simple: I made a choice.  A choice to not be stuck doing a survival job while waiting for my agent to call me with work.  A choice not to make someone else's dream come true but to focus on mine.  Instead, I work alongside my agent to find new work (PS: it's my career so I better be responsible for it).  I work (although work is the wrong term for something I enjoy so much) my business just a little everyday.   I do it for me and the future me.  'Cuz I sure as hell don't want to wake up one day wondering what if.  That is more terrifying for me than taking a huge risk.  I have only two true regrets in my life and I vowed to never have any more of those.

So I choose to create a life of abundance and one that is mine.  And what really rocks about it, is that after a few months of consistent effort on that front, it's starting to pay off exponentially.  That's right, my life doesn't add, it multiplies.  And that includes financially, artistically, and awesominity. See?  I even get to make up words.

So please, do yourself a favour: ask yourself where you want to be in five years and if what you are doing right now will get you there?  If it will, that's amazing.  If not, change something.  Start putting yourself on that path now.  You don't want to regret not doing now.  And while I have been fortunate enough to make big changes in my life, you don't have to do it that way.  Small things in the nooks and crannies of your day multiply (there's that word again) into huge results.

Take the first terrifying step and repeat until it's not scary anymore.  It's so worth it.

Happy creating!

PS: I'm going to be an aunt (again!) this week!!!  Can't wait to meet and spoil the girls...yes, plural!

From Audition Machine to Booking Maniac

Yeah, baby.  It's music to an actor's ears when that phone rings or email pings with booking news.  I'm so excited to be working on two projects before July ends.  Both will be a different challenge for me as I've never worked in these formats.  Am I being vague?  Yes, sorry but until everything is OK for release, I can't spoil anything!


And all of this to be followed up by a short film in August!  So I guess the web series (both of 'em) that I'm developing are going heading to the back burner again for a few weeks.  I swear, they will be filmed and posted someday in the near future!


Happy creating!

Your Agent Doesn't Hate You

I read this awesome post in Backstage and loved it.  Secret Agent Man is pretty straightforward.  Read why  Your Agent Doesn't Hate You . In fact, they probably like you quite a lot.  What they don't like, is what is known in this industry as flakiness. And yes, everyone experiences it in every walk of life but actors are a special brand.  You would think that in a field where the competition is so intense for so few jobs, we'd be the most reliable people on the planet. But we're not.  And we give a bad name to ourselves because of it.


I first ran into this problem, actually, outside of the film industry.  I was interviewing at a temp agency for that ever needed survival job (see My Other Job as to why I don't need to do that anymore) and when the question of acting came up, it was like something the size of the Berlin Wall sprang up.  My interviewer's face became cold and our rapport immediately fell flat.  She resolutely told me, "We don't work with your sort of people".  I remember a moment of silence and then some awkwardness as the interview came to it's obvious end.  And when I got home, I got mad.  You don't work with my sort of people?  You. Don't. Work. With. MY. Sort. Of. People.  Well, screw you.  Not all of my people are like that.  Some of the hardest working and reliable people I know are actors and film industry people.  Who else willing works 14 hour days for a teeny tiny bit of money (if anything at all) for months at a time and loves it?  No one, I say, no one.


But as I've gotten to know more people in this industry, I see where this stereotype comes from.  And it sucks.  We are flaky and it's just not fair to those on our teams.  Our agents, managers, publicists, favourite casting directors go to bat for us everyday.  They depend on our performance for a living.  Maybe we owe it to them to man up and treat this like a career.  You know, one where you actually have to be disciplined and show up.  And then, maybe you'll stop wondering if your agent hates you.


Happy creating!

Network vs. Cable

It doesn't take a lot to see that TV has evolved.  Drastically, I might add.  And with A-list films stars flocking to the tube (should that still even be a nickname for TV?), our weekly addictions are only going to get better.  At least, on cable channels.  Now, this isn't to say there aren't great shows on network TV anymore (Revenge, Community, Big Bang Theory to name a few) but it has become glaringly clear that the winning horse right now is original cable programming.


You only have had to hear the collective held breath for the recent season of AMC's Mad Men or witness the flurry of Walking Dead related hashtags that popped up every Sunday night on Twitter to see that TV Land has changed.  And I think that's a good thing.  We love our good TV.  And the networks seem to be open to at least trying to alter their long held beliefs.  Notice I said "open to", not "completely changing".  While I don't work for a network, I would have to assume that in order to change a few decades worth of values and perceived target markets, it's going to take a lot more than zombies and clamouring for Don Drapper suits to change their regularly scheduled tunes.  But as this article from the New York Times states, from scheduling to number of episodes ordered, it's slowing happening.  And that can only be a good thing in an industry that is struggling with lower budgets and the wealth of great online entertainment (translation: awesome web series--not just something your crazy neighbour does for fun anymore), right?


Now, can someone please let Community remain in its awkward and random gloriousness?  Or if not, can some cable channel pick it up?


Happy creating!

Be The Heroine in Your Own Life

With the passing of Nora Ephron, one of the greats left us this week.  Of course, as a woman in the film industry, I am mourning the loss of one of trailblazers, one of the few women who helmed studio pictures, who successfully navigated the world of Hollywood with a capital "H"; but more than that, I mourn the loss of a great storyteller.  Ms. Ephron could capture people and write the poetry of their souls.  Furthermore, her characters were quirky, unreasonable, and a little insane.  Just like the rest of us.


The worlds she created for us have been stamped upon our pop culture lexicon.  It only takes someone to quote "I'll have what she's having" or paint the image of two strangers meeting atop the Empire State building for us to know what the reference is (and if you don't, go brush up on your rom-com classics, kids).  And that is a remarkable accomplishment, right up there with "Feel the force" and "We're gonna need a bigger boat". 


But as I've been reading the articles on her life and her legacy (with multitudes still to appear in the coming days, I'm sure), I've been struck by her thoughts on the rest of the world and how many of them so firmly resonate with me.  She was someone who took control of her life and lived it.  And as someone who chose to live as a creative person, that is incredibly rare.  How many people give up?  How many times did Ms. Ephron almost throw in the towel?  I'm sure it's too numerous to count.  But she didn't and that is more amazing than memorable lines and scenes.


So rest in peace, Ms. Ephron, safe home and thank you for the inspiration.


“Above all, be the heroine of your life, not the victim.” - Nora Ephron


Happy creating

Something Small

It's been a rough week in our household.  Truth be told, it's been a bit hellish on the old Tonya front.  I once read an elegant phrase (thank you, Diana Gabaldon--and forgive me for paraphrasing...) about when you share your soul, you always have a small secret place that is yours alone-- that no matter what happens, that little haven stands to mark what sums up to be you.  You can trust it to shelter your inner most being, to store the things that are important.  I've found that my centre holds not only my values and the images I hold of myself, but also the things that I cherish, that bring me joy. So in order to get things back to normal, I reached down and remembered what it is like to enjoy some simple pleasures.  And, because I know there are those out there having a time that would put Buffy on graduation day to shame, here's my list of little things that can make you appreciate the loveliness of life:


Reading under a tree;
Feeling the breeze from an open window;
A long hug from a loved one;
Cuddles with your pet;
Discovering new places close to home


Happy creating and appreciating



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First Quarter Fun...

Yeah.  I know.  Get it out now.  Nothing since February.  Sorry.  But!  I have my reasons!  One of which I've posted below.  It's a great little film adapted from a Tobias Wolf short story.  Adapted for the screen and directed by the uber talented Shane Belcourt, I hope you enjoy "Say Yes". 


One of my many roles is manager of a dance company and our big production just went up last weekend.  And yes, while it was full of the usual pre-show stress and jitters, the performance itself was stellar.  I'm stoked by how well it was received and the awesome attention it has brought upon the company.  


So now those projects I've had bubbling away on multiple back burners can finally be attended to.  I can't wait to dig into them again.  From writing to producing to acting projects, I get to wear my many hats over the next couple of weeks.  Oh and don't forget international business woman as well.  Yup, my at home biz has crossed a border!


So, my first quarter of 2012 was awash with great success and I can't wait for the next one! Anyway, enjoy "Say Yes"!


Happy creating!

A Little Gratitude

So I had a day of gratitude yesterday.  Yes, I know, I should have those everyday but yesterday in particular, I was especially thankful for everyone and everything I have in my life.


What brought this on you may ask?  Well, partly it was because I learned that a friend from university passed away suddenly just before the holidays.  And while it's horrible when anyone dies suddenly, this one in particular hit me hard.  She and I worked together on her third year directing project and she was honestly one of the sweetest people I met while at school.  Her passing just brought home how fleeting life can be and it's something we take for granted.  We assume that everyday will unfold just as the day before but that's just not true.


Now this isn't the first time I've had this wake-up call.  When my father passed away unexpectedly five years ago, I had a similar experience.  His death is what pushed me into professional acting.  Before then, it was something I only talked about, something I was going to someday when the time was right.  But guess what?  The time was never going to be right and if I waited then, I would probably still be waiting.  So while I still miss my dad everyday and wish he could see my life now, I'm grateful that his passing prompted positive action on my part.


So thank you for reading, for chatting on either my Facebook or Twitter account, watching my videos, and just plain ol' being around.  I'm truly grateful.  Now go call your mom, sibling, best friend, lover, or agent and tell them that you are happy that they are in your life.


Happy creating!

A Few of My Favourite Things

No, this isn't going to end up with me handing out cars to anyone--Oprah already did that.  This is more of a reflection of what I enjoy so much about what I do.  It's really the people.  I love the meeting of minds, the sharing of experiences, and the reassurance that we're all going through the same thing.


I met a friend of a friend recently for the first time and we had a blast chatting over coffee about acting, the entertainment biz, skin care and the constant struggle finding the right stuff, and the joys of mixing traditional employment with creative endeavors.  Even though we had never met in person before, sharing our common experience was amazing.  We laughed over the craziness our chosen path creates and all the things we have to do to work in this field.  Like I said, it was a blast.


But besides that, it was just great connecting with someone else who gets it.  To many people, what we do as entertainment business professionals seems either confusing, glamorous, or downright crazy.  I enjoyed just chatting with someone who knows all the weirdness but loves it regardless.


So cheers, my new friend!  Here's to more chats over coffee and laughs about what we put ourselves through everyday, just so we have the pleasure to call ourselves actors!


Happy creating!

My Dreammaker

Yeah, I probably made that word up.  At least, most spell checkers don't recognize it.  But it's mine and it describes so much of what I've doing during this period of relative blog silence.


While I can't say that Steven Spielberg finally called and offered me a fantastic part (PS: I'm waiting, Steven, FYI), I have been doing some serious work on making my dreams come true.


Like most actors, aside from those of gracing the stage at the Oscars and being part of well-received, widely released films, my day-to-day dreams are actually quite small.  What most people my age want are to be able to afford a house, have kids, and maybe get a dog.  OK, we have two cats, so I guess we have some of that.  But those aren't far fetched dreams for a lot of people I know.  They can be made reality with just a small amount of effort.  But for a two actor/writer household?  Those are practically akin to aiming for moon during the Middle Ages.


Don't get me wrong.  I love our apartment.  I love being creative in how we figure out the eternal storage dilemma.  I most certainly love our cats.  But just sometimes, I find myself looking at real estate postings for condos and houses and dreaming.


OK, Tonya, you could go out and get a job that pays you more and then you could do all that.  Don't worry, I hear that voice too.  But often with those jobs, you sacrifice flexibility and as you actor-types know, having flexibility in your survival job is the Holy Grail, especially when that audition notice comes for tomorrow and it's 7pm.  And you have 6 pages to memorize and a lead character to develop. And the audition is at 9am. Across the city.


But this post is about my dreammaker, not my dream destroyer or, at least, not my make-your-dreams-almost-impossible-to-achiever.  So what has that been lately?  I'm building a business from home.  Something that I run and organize in the hour or two a day I can spare.  In other words, I fit it around my acting, writing, producing, exercising, cooking, survival job, and time with my family and friends.  And it's working.  Slowly but surely, I'm beginning to see the results from my barely part-time job time commitment.  Not bad, huh?


So for those of you who wonder how it can be done, if it's something you love, you will make it happen.  The key is making sure that everything else you do allows for your passion to flourish.  And if what you do on the side is something you are also passionate about, then congrats!  Your life is pretty darn great!


Happy creating!